Am struggling quite abit being home after the otherworldliness of the university lifestyle. As soon as you return it is like you are back in your same old life as if you never left yet knowing that you have changed quite a lot even though there is some of you that remains the same. (sorry about the poor english)

Everything is so strange because I really want to do big things for God yet remain stuck in some of my old ways. Ifound this really helpful. It kind of comes from talking to the pastor at my church but also the purpose driven life (day10).

Purposedrivenlifesays that life is all about surrender  either to God or to any of  the other “idols” we are  quite good  at making for ourselves  (basically anything else which isn't God). Anyways this is what I discovered in my conversation with my pastor. We looked at :

Romans 10

14How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? 15And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, "How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!"
16But not all the Israelites accepted the good news. For Isaiah says, "Lord, who has believed our message?" 17Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ.

The key verse in our discussion was verse 17. If I want to do big things for God. I must surrender to him. I can only do this if I trust him and I can only do this if I know him. If I hear his message through his word. God wants surrendered people.

CS Lewis quoted by Rick Warren says “It is when I turn to Christ, when I give up myself to his personality, that I first begin to have real personality of my own.” I think this is important for me because I have been trying to achieve things in my own right not really trusting God.